Chapter 4 Part II

The next thing we knew it was time to start celebrating Christmas. First, there was a party at Joey’s. Next, we celebrated at Russell’s. At first, it was just Russell, Rachel, Libby, and I because we came early to set up the food and clear the dance floor. Some of Russell’s family members stuck around and tried to teach us to dance. Eventually, we kind of did our own thing for a bit, but then got bored before too many more people showed up.

Apparently, a group of people were coming late because of a pageant at one of the smaller churches. Then, when the group finally showed up, I waited anxiously as ten people wandered into the house and was very disappointed that Drummer wasn't one of them. Just when I had given up on him, I noticed a voicemail on my phone, so I headed toward the front door to get away from the noise. When I opened the door and saw him standing on the front porch, wearing a black t-shirt to accent the belt and shoes I loved, giving someone directions on his phone, I nearly jumped I was so startled. I said “hey” almost more in surprise than as a greeting, and then walked down the driveway. After determining that the message did not necessitate an immediate response, I hung up the phone and turned back to face the house, only to find that Drummer was no longer there.

During the evening it felt like he occasionally moved into a room or stayed in a room because I was in it, but I could only hope rather than know that to be the case. At one point, Libby agreed to accompany me into a room where Drummer was talking with a bunch of people we didn’t really know. Libby, in her typical blunt fashion, asked for introductions and then they asked for our names. After I said my name, there was a slight pause, and then, looking intently at me, Drummer chimed in awkwardly, "You know, I was just reading your name in the Bible... I didn't know that's where it was from... I can't remember who she was, though... I think it was in II Sam-" I then finished his sentence for him because I was so eager for him to know that I understood what he was thinking.

To my relief, he didn’t skip a beat and he seemed engaged as we talked about other names and people in the Old Testament. Once again, we found ourselves engaged in a conversation, while everyone around us was not at all interested. I took this opportunity and scooted over closer to him, but he was in the middle of a full couch so I couldn't get very close. When the conversation turned to the football game on the TV behind me, I once again snatched the opportunity and strategically let him know that I liked his preferred football team, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Unfortunately, that was the extent of our interactions at the party because he left with the large group of people who had come from the pageant. To add insult to injury, I wasn’t able to get the hug I had been hoping for because Drummer was on the phone when he left. My one consolation was that he hadn’t really been able to say goodbye to anyone.

The next day, I decided to send out one last ditch effort to get his attention because I figured he wouldn’t pursue me unless he believed I liked him, right? So I sent him an e-mail with a picture from the party. My crazy Libby had struck a pose in front of the couch he was sitting on so that I could take a picture. Drummer asked to see it at the party and said that he liked it, so I thought I’d send it to him. The e-mail read:

[Drummer]-

You left... with 10 other people... and then the party died and we all went to bed like good little church-goers... but I didn't get my hug, so I think you'll just have to make it up to me later. ;-)

Here's a pic for you... have fun reading II Samuel... you know, I haven't been reading through the Old Testament lately... I need to do that again...

Anyway, I'll talk to you later

Michal

The following Wednesday at the 20’s group, the socializing after the event took a weird turn. I was standing with a group of girls that had formed a sort of circle near the stage. Drummer stepped off the stage and literally hugged and greeted everyone in the circle, but completely ignored me. Needless to say I was quite hurt. However, I didn’t want to give up too quickly so a few minutes later I ventured to the back of the room where he stood on the outskirts of a group of people I wasn’t familiar with.
I greeted him and tried to start a conversation with him, but he all but refused to make eye contact with me and then when I was in the middle of a sentence, he literally turned and walked away. Immediately following the pain came confusion and then anger. Well, I can take a hint.

On the drive home that night with Libby and Rachel I was pretty down. Libby tried her best to bring clarity to the situation by telling me of a discovery she had made that night: Drummer had a girlfriend… had had a girlfriend the entire time we had known him. Apparently, she didn’t enjoy hanging out with his friends and that’s why she’d never been around. But why hadn’t he mentioned her? It didn’t make sense.

Over a week went by and I hadn’t seen him, but I had finished his book. All I wanted to do was to return it to him and be rid of him because I could think of no other way to get him out of my head. Early that Sunday morning, I got a call from Libby telling me that she and Rachel were planning to visit Drummer’s church that morning. I jumped on that bandwagon so that I could return Drummer’s book and also so that I could spend more time with Libby before I went home for Christmas. However, I couldn’t deny that I was a little excited to see Drummer again regardless of his feelings toward me.

Libby, Rachel, and I walked into the rented movie theater for the church service and made our way up one of the aisles. I soon forfeited the seat closest to the aisle for Rachel because she wasn’t feeling well. When the music was over, Drummer left the stage area and walked up the aisle past Rachel to sit a couple rows behind us. It wasn’t until the close of the service that Drummer even noticed us, and he immediately descended the stairs as we filed out of our row into the aisle. Because I had switched seats with Rachel, I was the last one out of the row and therefore the one standing next to Drummer in the aisle. He was all smiles and didn’t even seem the least bit awkward when I gave back the book I had borrowed.

It was at this point that I noticed a girl about our age standing behind Drummer and I thought she was trying to pass and that we were in her way, so without thinking it through I said, “I’m sorry, are we in your way?”

She simply replied, “No, I’m fine.” Then it hit me: she’s the girlfriend!

Since Drummer never introduced her, we couldn’t even say, “Nice to meet you” when we left.

When I returned from my Christmas vacation, the family I lived with greeted me with the news that the Nanny who had been their first choice when they hired me was now available again and they were sending me back to California in a week. Seriously!?!

I tried desperately with the time that I had left to find a job and a place to live nearby, but to no avail. I was not ready to leave my friends in Florida, but leave I must. I sent a farewell e-mail to Drummer because while at home for Christmas I had finally figured out the title of the book I had wanted to recommend at the bonfire. I even brought it with me to Florida hoping to lend it to him, but with my impending departure that was no longer a possibility. At that point I think I still wanted some kind of friendship, but I fully expected no response to my e-mail given Drummer’s e-mail habits and recent behavior.

I had a tearful goodbye with Libby and Rachel and then reluctantly jumped on a plane headed back to California. After settling back in at home that night, I logged onto the computer to check my e-mail and read this:

Girl Mike, that's so cute I can't stand it. Thanks for the info. I received about 15 books between Christmas and birthday. So I'm all booked up for now. However I will check it out at some point. Sorry to hear why you're leaving that's kind of like having the rug pulled out from under you. Hope Cali treats you well and you come back soon. See you soon.

Work in progress,
[Drummer]

I stormed out of the den and paced (in a stomping fashion) up and down the hallway on the second floor of my parent’s house. He can’t call me cute! Not after everything else! I can’t believe he would dare! He called me cute! And he wants me to come back soon? How can he call me cute? Seriously?!?

Now
Drummer and the girlfriend are married. And whenever I talk about Drummer, the recollection still brings a surprising amount of pain to the surface.